17-May-2005

Wow! I feel great now! Medicines prescribed for big people have great effects on little people. :) I’m going to have to start a collection of the various bottles received from different caring souls, plus get an in-box to hold all of my “doctor’s orders.” Everyone has been so compassionate; it just kind of overwhelms me. One person makes the most sympathetic little groan that I want to hug them each time.

Just so it’s clear, I didn’t re-injure myself today, it’s just a little aggravated and sore, nothing that a few frantic days of studying won’t cure :) I’ve been thinking a lot about why I got the set back a few days ago and I ended up writing my commentary on that line of thinking, and I’m going to post two paragraphs which follows my line of thought.

Sorrow and joy; opposites reconciled. The sorrow is great, frantic, desperate; trouble has caused the afflicted to cry out. Yet the very source of pain becomes the catalyst for joy. The joy that comes is very different from the sorrow; it is calm, controlled and peaceful; a quiet inner happiness that comes from being well off.

I have experienced a time of sorrow, maybe not as intense as the disciples losing Jesus, but I did cry out in despair and frustration. I sustained injury not once but twice; my lifestyle as I knew it has been altered; I have a fear of what the near future might bring. But I have this hope, that God will turn my sorrow into joy as I strive to put on a garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. In Psalm 51 David pleads with God to “Make me to hear joy and gladness,” the word “hear” implies attentiveness and obedience. I must purposefully listen, straining to catch His voice, which could not be heard when I was so busy venting my own feelings. Maybe that’s why the joy that comes is calm and quiet, such a contrast to the sorrow. The last half of the plea from David is that “the bones which Thou hast broken may rejoice.” My source of sorrow will be turned into the basis of my joy.

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